December 14. 2009 by admin.

Today marks the 30th straight day that I’ve been living here in Pi.  There is no major revelations to report, so I will just touch on a couple of things that have been on my mind.

As some of you may know, my Father is completely Deaf.  He was born that way and after spending years with a Speech Therapist, he can speak just as good as any other person, instead of just making “sounds or noises” like most of his Deaf friends.

However, no matter how well he can speak; it doesn’t change the fact that he cannot hear……at all.  Sitting down and talking to him at a table face-to-face is very easy for both parties involved.  Add another person and it gets slightly more complicated.  Add two, three or four more people and it can get very overwhelming for him to try and keep track of the conversation.  I’m just as guilty as anyone else…..as I can remember numerous times sitting at a restaurant or something with my Father and friends or family and I start talking with someone else at the table.  If my Dad is not sitting at just the right angle at the table, then he will be unable to read my lips and/or the other persons lips as well.  Thereby, completely inhibiting his ability to follow along with the conversation.  My Father easily recognizes facial reactions; i.e, raised eyebrows, smiles, surprised looks, etc., etc.  When he sees these, he usually asks what it is that is being discussed.

At that point, it is easier (and more selfish) to just blow it off and give him a very brief version of what was just said, rather than re-explain the whole thing.  When there is four or five people sitting at the table, this exact same situation can be happening X 4.  So, there is really no way for him to be involved, let alone aware of the ongoing conversations…..unless somebody makes a genuine effort to either include him and translate or take the time to re-explain everything, or talk slowly and clearly while looking in his direction so he can follow along.

Over the last 30 days, I have been given a first-hand view of what it is like to be “left out” of a conversation, only to be given the “quick summary” later………if I am lucky.  Based on the Philippine Government Census Statistics, it is estimated that about 71% of all people in the Philippines can speak English at a “conversational” level……so what’s the problem??? lol

It is VERY frustrating to be sitting in a room and having everyone around you speaking in a language that you cannot understand.  Of course, this does not happen to me every time, but it definitely does happen.  Sometimes, I am sitting with a group of people and the entire dinner goes by without a single word of Cebuano or Tagalog being spoken, but other times, that is almost all I hear.  Even more frustrating is when I know they are talking about me…..

I’m not sure who is more at “fault”……Is it me; for not taking the time to learn the language of the Country I live in, or is it the fault of the people I am with for not being more polite and speaking or translating so that I can understand them better?  I’m going to guess the fault lies more on my side.  I’m on their turf……  I wouldn’t go camping without bringing the proper gear, so I guess I need to work on learning a new language.

JOHN    

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December 4. 2009 by admin.

Recently, I’ve had some friends ask me the reasons of my motivation to move to Pi.  While the actual list of my personal reasons is numerous, there is something that I read a few months before I left the USA that has always “stuck” with me.

I cannot take any credit for this write-up.  I found it on a Forum during all of my research about the Philippines, it’s lifestyle and more importantly; the personal experiences of many other Foreigners.  Some of them from the USA, Europe, Australia, etc., after their arrival here and how things are going for them 2, 3, 5 and even 8 years later after their arrival.

Again, this is NOT my own personal experience, but my internal motives, thoughts and feelings are very, very similar.  One last thing….I have edited it slightly so that it’s content can be more clearly understood by the reader.  Enjoy!

I was an idiot up until my late 20’s. That is to say, I wanted all the trappings of wealth and success but lacked the patience, so was always up to my eyeballs in debt.

This didn’t make me happy.

Once I realized there were no shortcuts, I knuckled down to reach my goal of financial independence the hard way. So I planned, studied, worked and implemented a plan. Ten years later I had reached my goal and had the grand estate, luxury car etc, etc.

This still didn’t make me happy.

I should have been happy. I had everything I had worked so hard for; so what was wrong? It took a while for me to realize that all that fancy stuff I thought I needed, was just adding to my stress. My car made me happy initially but that quickly faded and it became just a means of getting from point A to B. I loved my huge house and my land initially, but again the joy proved to be transitory. What I learned is that whatever material possessions you accumulate in life cannot give you long term satisfaction. Every month there were so many bills to pay, bills I could easily afford but they were a constant nagging reminder of how lacking in real independence I was. My contentment seemed to depend on paying all this money and life shouldn’t be like that. Happiness shouldn’t be directly proportional to dollars; and in fact in my case I found it wasn’t.

It took me years to fully understand and realize what I needed to do and it was not an easy decision. It’s always been my philosophy that life is too important and too short to waste. If you are not happy where you are, then you owe it to yourself to make changes; big changes until you find an arrangement that works. So I sold the house, the car, most of my possessions and moved in to a small 2 bedroom flat here in Australia. This proved to be a wise choice as living simpler gave me more peace of mind and I’ve never regretted it. I didn’t miss the “stuff” and rather enjoyed a contentment completely independent of how many fancy gadgets I owned.

But after a while my thirst for travel and adventure compelled me to seek fresh fields to graze upon. I was so bored with Australia! I’ve been to many countries but never to Asia so I researched for many months before choosing the Philippines as a likely candidate for living a few years. I was there in Pi for 3 days when I decided I wanted to stay - at least until the differences cease to be so different and it gets boring.

My needs are few and any more than them……I do not want. I have no desire to slip back into a materialistic lifestyle I have long since foregone. I determined what my minimum needs are and will stick to them.

1. Comfortable, clean, safe, air conditioned environment.
2. Fast internet.
3. Cable TV.
4. Located in a good area in a City with lots of shops nearby.

The last point might seem a little ironic but despite rarely purchasing, when I do need to buy something, I don’t want to have to search high and low to find it.

Now don’t get me wrong… Money is very, very important. However, working your whole life seems to me such a waste but you have to have enough money so that your money can work for you and the income it provides can meet your needs. But what I discovered and maybe it only works for me, is that no matter how much money you have, and how well you can afford a gaudy lifestyle, to allow yourself to be seduced by the siren song of the shiny trinkets, is not a true path to contentment. It becomes like a drug that you constantly need another hit. The greater your presumed needs, the more fragile is the foundation to your happiness.

The simple life is a contented one. When you are less obsessed with accumulating stuff, there is more time for spiritual contemplation on the things that really matter.

So “How expensive is a relatively low needs lifestyle?” In my case, around $600 USD a month. Despite what others may think, I’m not poor and could easily spend many thousands a month but I know spending more than I do, would not add to the sum total of my happy life. On the contrary, doing so would likely detract from my net enjoyment in the long term. I don’t like spending money, because I always have to ask myself, is this going to make my life better or worse? Furthermore, indulging in a profligate lifestyle will find you surrounded by fair weather friends and women who don’t really care about you as a person but rather as a meal ticket and their company is predicated on the continuous flow of funds.

But there is no single answer to the question posted of how much it costs to have a “low needs” lifestyle.  It is rather too subjective to define in a general sense. First you have to think carefully and define exactly what your needs are. The above is what works very well for me but each must follow their own path.

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December 3. 2009 by admin.

In my last entry, I wrote some things about the different “quirks” of life here in the Philippines and this post will add to that.

Something interesting I have noticed lately is that people do not come to your front door and knock if they need you.  They simply stand outside your front gate or in your front yard and yell your name.  It doesn’t matter if it’s the neighbor, the landlord, a delivery, a salesman, etc….  I haven’t had anybody knock on my door since I got here….and it’s not just because I am an American.  It’s the same everywhere.

As I was writing this, a “Tindero” (or Fruit Vendor) man just walking by carrying a huge basket on his shoulder, selling oranges and other assorted vegetables stood outside our gate (that easily opens) shouting something I cannot understand.  I went to check it out and bought a nice bag of oranges for a great price….(I think)….lol  I see about 4-5 people like this stop by daily selling all kinds of things.

A few days ago, I got my first bill from the Internet Company here; SmartBro.  There are no mailmen here…..so it’s delivered door-to-door by a guy on a bicycle.  He had a huge stack of bills in his basket and I simply sign a piece of paper that I received it.  To pay it, I can stop by numerous “outlets” or even most Banks will also accept the payments.

When you go to the malls here, there is armed security guards at the entrances to do a quick search of your bag and yourself as well.  It is separated by a Male/Female entry area.  Walking around the mall feels very “normal” and no different then the USA.  However, once you enter a store, particularly, the main department stores (somewhat like a Sears) there is an abundance of salespeople to help you.  Both male and female, with 99% of them being about 18-28 years old it seems.  Everyone is super young as the age “limit” for most girls is about 24-25…..unless you are a Manager, then the limit is about 35.  There will be someone to greet you when you walk in the door; usually another security guard. 

After that, you will see LOTS of salespeople there, all dressed exactly the same.  The men wear black shoes, black slacks and a white button up shirt, while the girls wear these very sexy, (in my opinion) short, simple blue dresses, with black heels.  All of the girls wear about 2 1/4 pounds more make up then they should.  Seriously.  The lipstick and blush is WAY overdone and it makes some of these naturally pretty and dark skinned girls look like white ghosts or like cheap prostitutes.  I have no idea why they put on SO much……but it looks really bad on almost all of them.  On a side note, when you flip through a Filipino Edition of Cosmo or FHM, etc….there is lots of advertisements for “whitening” creams, powders, lotions, etc., as many girls here want to be white like American women are.  Funny, since so many American girls spend so much money on tanning booths, oils, etc….

Anyway….as you pause to look at something, there will be a small swarm of salespeople to help you.  They are not pushy….but they will stand there and be “on the ready” at a moment’s notice if you need them.  So much different then the USA, where you can wander aimlessly looking at clothes, etc. and never be approached by a salesperson.  After you see something(s) you like and are holding them, a salesperson will likely take it from you and escort you to the cash register.  Now…..this is where it gets interesting.  At just one cash register, there may be 2-4 girls.  One will scan the item(s) while the other starts bagging them (There is no security devices on the clothing here).  Once your total is announced and you give your Credit Card to the girl, she will swipe it through 1-2 different devices and then will usually give you two receipts to sign.  She then has to enter your card # and some other info into her computer.  I swear it feels like 15 minutes everytime I am standing there at a register…..lol  Finally, she will print out a 3rd receipt.  This is then handed to the other girl where she will tape it to the outside of your bag.  Meanwhile, she has also tied your bag in numerous knots, so that no other merchandise can be added to your bag as you walk out the store….  It really is an interesting process the first few times you experience it…..and you better not be in a hurry.

Restaurants have a similar method.  When you walk in, you are taken to your table and sat down and provided with a menu.  All is normal so far….then it changes.  The waitress will stand back behind you and await your order.  Then, after you ask for your drinks or appetizers, she is usually still standing there!?!?  Once you place your ”real” order, she will leave.  I’m used to being left alone for 5-10 minutes, then placing an order for drinks and/or appetizers, then being left alone again for 5-10 minutes, then placing my actual order.

During the eating process, all is normal again, then when the bill comes, you are reminded that you are not in the USA.  The girl will bring the bill (usually only after you have asked for it) and will set it on the table in the usual ”book-pad”.  The girl will stay there and wait for your payment.  It feels very awkward, because maybe I am not yet done chatting with my dinner company, or still nibbling on some food, etc.  So, I feel rushed to get my wallet out and look at the bill and give her my card or the cash.  Then, it happens again when she brings back your credit card receipt!  She will put the book-pad on the table and wait for you to sign it and fill out the tip, etc…before she will leave.  I should be grateful that it is actually such an efficient and fast process compared to America, where it takes some time for you to get the bill, pay it, get your receipt or change and leave.  Here it all happens very quickly…..just make sure you are TRULY ready to leave once you ask for the bill, otherwise it feels like the waitress is hovering over you the whole time. 

That’s it for now! 

JOHN

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