Today marks the 30th straight day that I’ve been living here in Pi. There is no major revelations to report, so I will just touch on a couple of things that have been on my mind.
As some of you may know, my Father is completely Deaf. He was born that way and after spending years with a Speech Therapist, he can speak just as good as any other person, instead of just making “sounds or noises” like most of his Deaf friends.
However, no matter how well he can speak; it doesn’t change the fact that he cannot hear……at all. Sitting down and talking to him at a table face-to-face is very easy for both parties involved. Add another person and it gets slightly more complicated. Add two, three or four more people and it can get very overwhelming for him to try and keep track of the conversation. I’m just as guilty as anyone else…..as I can remember numerous times sitting at a restaurant or something with my Father and friends or family and I start talking with someone else at the table. If my Dad is not sitting at just the right angle at the table, then he will be unable to read my lips and/or the other persons lips as well. Thereby, completely inhibiting his ability to follow along with the conversation. My Father easily recognizes facial reactions; i.e, raised eyebrows, smiles, surprised looks, etc., etc. When he sees these, he usually asks what it is that is being discussed.
At that point, it is easier (and more selfish) to just blow it off and give him a very brief version of what was just said, rather than re-explain the whole thing. When there is four or five people sitting at the table, this exact same situation can be happening X 4. So, there is really no way for him to be involved, let alone aware of the ongoing conversations…..unless somebody makes a genuine effort to either include him and translate or take the time to re-explain everything, or talk slowly and clearly while looking in his direction so he can follow along.
Over the last 30 days, I have been given a first-hand view of what it is like to be “left out” of a conversation, only to be given the “quick summary” later………if I am lucky. Based on the Philippine Government Census Statistics, it is estimated that about 71% of all people in the Philippines can speak English at a “conversational” level……so what’s the problem??? lol
It is VERY frustrating to be sitting in a room and having everyone around you speaking in a language that you cannot understand. Of course, this does not happen to me every time, but it definitely does happen. Sometimes, I am sitting with a group of people and the entire dinner goes by without a single word of Cebuano or Tagalog being spoken, but other times, that is almost all I hear. Even more frustrating is when I know they are talking about me…..
I’m not sure who is more at “fault”……Is it me; for not taking the time to learn the language of the Country I live in, or is it the fault of the people I am with for not being more polite and speaking or translating so that I can understand them better? I’m going to guess the fault lies more on my side. I’m on their turf…… I wouldn’t go camping without bringing the proper gear, so I guess I need to work on learning a new language.
JOHN